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Have your friends ever made fun of the new clothes you wore?
I’m sure they have. It’s a pretty common occurrence among guys.
Whenever you try something new (e.g. a hat, a scarf, or a leather jacket), your friends will notice and they will feel an unconquerable need to comment on it. It’s unavoidable.
Now you may have some friends that will give you a compliment, but more often you’ll receive mockery instead.
Some guys will be self-assured enough to shrug these comments off, but others will lose the confidence to ever wear the item again.
It’s a problem that holds a lot of guys back from improving their style.
That’s why I’m going to tell you how to deal with it.
How Most Guys Try to Deal with Mockery
Most guys go into defense-mode when they’re being mocked.
They’re on the road to improvement and they’re expecting a few jabs along the way. Their favorite blogger has told them they shouldn’t care what anyone else thinks.
“Your friends make fun because they’re jealous. They don’t want you to improve yourself, because they don’t want the group dynamic to change. At least you have the balls to try new things and work on your style.”
So when their friends attack, they start repeating those words.
Of course, this only adds fuel to the fire. It won’t make their friends stop. It will only make them more motivated to take you down a notch.
Why do you think they’re cracking jokes in the first place?
You’re Changing Their Reality
Your friends crack jokes, because you’re changing their reality with your newly improved style.
You’re changing your look, but you’re also changing their perception of you. They’re not used to seeing you dressed up, and they need time to adapt. Joking about it is their way of dealing with it.
They may even be a bit afraid of the change, because they worry they might lose you as a friend. They might feel like you’re outgrowing them, and it’s a lot easier to mock you than to grow with you.
Instead of fighting back against their comments and insulting them, you should try and show them you’re still the same old you… Just dressed a lot sharper.
So how do you do it?
Join in on the Fun
What you need to do is start cracking jokes about your new clothes along with them.
This accomplishes a couple of things:
- It shows them you’re still the same guy they know and love. They can still have fun with you. You’re still part of their group and you’re in on their jokes.
- It show them you’re comfortable in what you’re wearing, and nothing they say can break that.
- It alleviates all their commentary.
If you’re the one laughing the hardest, they can’t hurt you. They will see you’re not going to break under their pressure and they will be quicker to accept your new look. Heck, they may just start coming to you for fashion advice. Just ask Barron.
Now, I’m not saying you should instigate your own mocking, but when your friends inevitably start, you want to top each one of their jokes with one of your own.
The “Yes, and…” Technique
The “Yes, and…” technique, which comes from an old improv exercise, is excellent for dealing with mockery.
It works as follows: Whenever someone makes a joke at your expense, you simply agree with it, and then expand on it.
You just say “Yes, and [insert your joke]” That’s all there is to it.
Let me give you some examples:
Your New Item: A blazer.
The Zinger: “You running for Mayor or something?”
Your Comeback: “Yes, and after that it’s the White House. May even have to get myself a tie then”
Your New Item: A leather jacket.
The Zinger: “What’s up, Fonzie?”
Your Comeback: “Yeah, and I’m not stopping with the jacket. Tomorrow I’m jumping a shark!”
Your New Item: A scarf.
The Zinger: “Dude! Is that your girlfriend’s scarf?”
Your Comeback: “Totally! And I’m wearing her undies as well.“
See how easy that is? You’re taking their joke, and you make it an even bigger joke. It puts you in control of the conversation.
If you’re worried that you don’t have the improvising chops to pull this off, then remember that your joke doesn’t have to be comedic gold. Your friends will probably like your sense of humor already, so you don’t have to try hard. Just say whatever pops into mind.
Alright, Let’s Put You to the Test!
Let me show you how easy it is to use the “Yes, and…” technique.
Imagine I am one of your friends and we made plans to go out for a few drinks. You’re looking a bit dressier than usual, so I say…
“Oooooh la la! Look at you all dressed up. I had no idea this was a date!”
What is your comeback to that? Let’s hear it in the comments!